Cosmic Shifts >>>

*this photo was taken for a shoot I did for Softspoken that has not been fully released yet*

Tomorrow marks the day I will be putting my shops on vacation for two weeks.  For those of you who know me, you know this is a big deal for me.  Ive never really put my work aside for any given amount of time.  I kind of live and breath my work at all times.  Even when Im not working, Im thinking about it.  Okay, maybe I should not call it work, b/c for the most part, it doesnt feel like work.  And it all intertwines, the actual creating, the advertising, the photographing, the emailing, the packaging, the social networking, the errand running, the supply ordering... All of it.  But none of it really feels like work b/c for the most part I enjoy it all.  Okay, except for the supply ordering, I could do without that.  But this holiday season after the wonderful opportunity of being one of etsy's featured sellers, it has been a bit overwhelming.  It seems all my work has become is packaging.  I spend most of my day everyday making the orders for the day and packaging.  No time to make anything new or hardly daydream about making anything new.  I also have not even had a chance to begin to get caught up on tons of restocks for Ruche. And in between it all, I have some big things weighing on my heart as of late.  So Im really looking forward to this time I am taking for myself to explore these things.

Ive been feeling led lately.  Led in directions of healing, of finding news ways of living.  I keep creating connections with lovely ladies who exude love and healing power through their hearts.  I keep landing on websites and blogs that remind me of the deeper places in my heart, places I tend to forget about b/c I spend so much time being overwhelmed in my 'work' life.  Im seeking balance.  Im realizing I need to spend more time for myself and the things I truly love outside of work.  I need to find more time to explore hobby like interests, and take better care of my body, inside and out.  Find simpler ways of doing things throughout my day so that I can concentrate more on these things.  I feel like my heart is calling me to cultivate my life in a preparation for a new amazing chapter down the road.  And a big part of that calling is to slow down.  To learn to be with myself outside of creating.  Besides my huge passion for creating things, I daydream alot about other things that I never allow myself the time to do...

I have made a little list for reference, and I thought Id share it here as a sort of accountability.  These are things that make my heart swoon when I think of them, and always seem to make an excuse for why I cant complete them each day... I tend to do them for a little while, and then fall off with it...

cook homeade healthy meals for dinner

cook more things from scratch

read more books

write poetry

garden

write handwritten letters

sing and record

learn to play the banjo

collage art - for myself

artsy photoshoots - just for fun

connect deeper with friends

have friends over to my house

hula hoop

yoga

long walks

bike rides

regular recycling

composting

These all seem easy enough, but it is so easy for me to waste away my extra time.  Alot of it is honestly spent online, which is one thing I need to let go of a bit.  Not my blog, but social networks.  At least really limit my time doing those things.  Or you know, browsing cute clothes online :)  The time I do spend online, I would love to use connecting deeper with the people who are helping me on my path of healing.  Im already learning how to let go of those who no longer bring goodness into my life.  Loss is always painful, but Im allowing it to not hurt me anymore.  

I will still be posting like usual, about all of the things I always do, but I may also be writing alot more about this process, and maybe even sharing my progress with the list above.  I know to alot of people, the list above may seem like all extra curricular activities that no one has time for in this busy world, but these are all things I feel passionate about, and want to slowly add them into my life so they are so second nature I dont have to schedule time for them.  I want them all to just be little parts of my daily life.  And I dont want to wake up one day and realize all Ive done in this life is create alot of work for myself.  When I have children, these are the kinds of things I want to share and do with them.  

Wow.  Sometimes I think a bit too much, eh? 

So, Im very ready for this little chunk of time Im setting aside for myself.  Ive already thought of a ton of things to fill up my time with... but I think Im going to let them all go, and go day by day.  I need this for myself.  It will be a fresh new start to a new amazing year.  From what I am learning, this new year is going to be full of changes within myself.  Cosmic shifts are happening in my soul, once again.  Propelled once again by death, and will hopefully be transformed into a more deeper sense of life.  

PEACE,

Laura

Letting the light shine in >>>

On monday, I went to yoga, for the second week in a row.  Can I just say for a moment, Im proud of myself.  Mini triumph!  Of course I owe it all to the help of a friend, by attending with me, but still.  Me and my mom used to go to this yoga class together every week for a few years, and I took about 2 years away from it... I am so so so glad I found myself back in this class.  It has been a catalyst for my healing period.  I drove myself there, it was wet morning, and I listened to an old tape I found in my car.  Its part of an 8 tape series on enlightenment, with the most calming speaker.  I headed the words of his wisdom as I drove along to class, soaking in the words I needed to hear.  Funny how the world works at times.  And once I get to class, my instructor seems to just continue on with the same needed words, on the same subject, reading from his books.  There was a clear message in the air.  The yoga was amazing and fully worked every muscle in my body, including ones I did not know I had.  Then, as we had our layout at the end of class, he covered our eyes with moist sage scented cloths.  It was instantly calming and stimulated happiness.  Instead of closing my eyes, I laid there with them wide awake.  The cloth was white, and with the flourescent lights from above shining through, it felt as if I was engulfed in a serene cloud like space.  I stayed there for a while and pondered.  I felt the urge to talk to my teacher after class and ask him for an insightful book list to help me along my path of healing.  We had a loving heart to heart, and he lent me his book right out of his bag.  Its called Wisdom of the Ages by Wayne Dyer.  If you havent read this yet, I suggest you do.  Im only two stories in and I already feel a profound movement within myself from it.  Amazing.  It has writings from 60 profound individuals from all of history.  Very insightful.  I feel like the people I have talked to in the past few days have all been leading me towards this amazing path of healing.  Ive had a few tears and felt some stings in my heart, but allowing myself to open and surrender to it is just what I need right now.  Im sort of in my own little world at the moment.  

 

On another note, I absolutely cannot believe that November is already half way over???  What the heck?  We were in starbucks today and christmas music was decking the halls all around us.  Im just not ready, but Im embracing the fact that this year is just going to be a bit shy of organized and prepared for.  And that has just got to be okay.  Tonite, I placed my first christmas gift order, so I feel a bit a relieved.  I just might put my shops on vaca for a bit while I get some things done in that respect... 

My boy just got home, so its time to put my fingers to rest.  (btw, I have the most amazing husband in all the land)...  love. this. boy.

PEACE,

Laura

The times are a changin' >>>

Good Morning!  Thank you so much to everyone who left such thoughtful feedback on my baby post.  I was pretty amazed at how many people came out and talked about their personal experiences here on the blog and on my facebook.  Thank you!  I know that all of my fears are valid, and also normal.  Some are a bit extreme, but only b/c of the circumstances Ive had to face so far in life with losing loved ones.  I am currently undergoing some major changes in my core being, which have really been validated through my personal readings with Julie.  Im quite impressed with her soul work and I feel like its starting me on a much needed journey of healing and truly loving myself.  As I work through some things I may share.  Alot of it is very personal work, so Ill most likely keep alot to myself, but as I feel I can, Ill share so that maybe you too can learn from it too.  We are all here to learn from each other as we walk this path of life.  There are so many different twists and turns we can take... people we can run to and people we can run away from... same goes for situations.  And the wonderful part is that it is all our choice.  We have the choice each morning when we wake up to decide what we are going to do (for the most part, besides your core needs, jobs and children, etc)... But you get the point.  I think so many people just ride lifes current and live.  But to truly live, I think you have to make some pretty hard choices and climb some pretty big mountains.  And the people you meet along the way are some of the most important parts.  Its not only through nature and god that we connect, but through others, even the ones that walk away from us.  There is something to be learned in it all.  And honestly, some of the people who have walked out of my life, although it hurt tremendously, it grew the biggest, most beautiful trees in my heart.  Sort of like pulling weeds out of your garden that you didnt realize were choking out the prettiest plants from blooming.  Then one day you turn around and realize a tree you never even knew existed has come into full bloom.  Get it???  Anyway, I have alot going on emotionally behind the scenes, and I dont forsee this as a 'weekend get away' kind of healing, but a life altering slow growing kind of healing.  

Yesterday we went to visit my family in the city.  They had just gotten back from a trip to Savannah Georgia and I was ancy to see everyone.  We had spagetti dinner at my nanna's, which I always eat wayyyy to much of b/c its sooooo good.  Then chocolate mousse pie!  My nanna sure knows how to fatten you up!  I always love eating at her house.  I got to play with my nephew Aiden, which doesnt happen often enough.  It was so much fun.  I got him a little airplane toy and he played with it the whole time we were there, it made my heart happy.  It was so nice to see my family.  And in just two weeks I get to see them again for Thanksgiving!!!

I think my outfit yesterday was one of my favorites.  So so comfy but still so me.  The necklace is one that will be coming to the shop soon.  I have lots of new goodies made, just havent had time to post them yet.  (and didnt James just look adorable???)

Side note:  I love butter beans.  Anyone else with me?  My mom always made them.  I hated them when I was younger, but grew to love them since she made them so often.  Now I eat them just to think of her and smile.  And it works!  And.... you know those beautiful solid colored bowls that they sell at Anthropologie???  Well, Ive been wanting to collect them for years now, but I can never bring myself to spend that much on a bowl.  When me and Shelley went shopping the other day, they had this teal color on sale for $2!!!!  So I got the first bowl in my collection!  Ill slowly collect them as I can.

PEACE,

Laura