Today is day 11 of our 30 day yoga (self love) challenge. So many of us have grown so fond of our group, we have decided to keep it alive way beyond 30 days. Maybe like, forever? It has been such an encouraging and engaging group of women. We are coming off of the high of the first week and are all finding it a bit challenging to keep up each day. I myself have for sure. I have already had 2 days where I did not do any yoga at all. Im completely okay with that, and recognize each day as a day to start over. Its a good reminder to parallel into life as well.
Ive been feeling a bit uneasy inside myself lately. As I am learning more and more of my heart and mind, I find more and more pockets that are filled with ego as opposed to love. (When I speak of ego, I do not mean the typical idea of ego or being egotistical) More so of allowing things like fear, certain judgements of others, emphasis on striving to be parts of my life. All qualities that most of us live with on a day to day basis without even thinking about it. But when I sit back and actually listen and watch, I see and hear these things. These ways I want to learn to live without in my life. Old habits Id like to break as I transition into a deeper level of awareness. It is so easy to feel wronged by someone, and then to pass judgement on them for making you feel bad. It is so easy to allow fear to keep us from reaching out to someone or to do something that could ultimately improve ourselves or others around us. It is so easy to constantly strive to outdo yourself, and to prove what? Im writing this more for myself, but maybe you will find similarities in your own heart if you are honest with yourself. We all are afterall, human. Sometimes we have to fumble around in the darkness long enough to see the light.
Back to the self love... here are a few pics from this week showing a few things I did for myself. I stuck my hands in the dirt, which felt so good. I made yummy food and have drank several mugs of lemon water. I hooped and tried to take photos at the same time! (now i need to try that with my yoga).
Okay, I think Im not done unloading. My heart just feels heavy. Mostly for reasons I wont talk about on my blog. My heart is with my grandfather in the hospital, with friends, with feeling the void of my parents. Times like these I tend to retreat into my little crab shell... So luckily my bestie is taking me out tonite. Im okay, no need to worry... Sometimes it just feels good writing it out. Sending it off into the universe. This is life. The pleasant and the unpleasant.