Today is my birthday! I have just stepped over the threshold into my 30's. A good solid number in my eyes. I feel like its a time in my life where I can still enjoy the youth of my body and mind, but in a more rooted and grounded way, not so carefree and wild, but still free spirited. Im at a point in my life where I know who my friends are and what they mean to me. Where my home is, and what it means to me. Although I will forever be on my own personal spiritual journey of growth and exploration, I feel I have a good sense my human-ness that co-exist with amazing cosmic abundance and support. I know who I am as an artist, even though that is ever growing as well, I feel like I have finally found my home in my creative life. Although I miss my parents terribly everyday, Im learning more and more how to allow myself to still be supported by their love that still floats around me in every bird, leaf and speck of dirt I walk on.
What I hope for my 30's is to become less afraid of doing some of things Ive always dreamt about doing. The biggest one is becoming a mother myself. Among many other little things like singing, hooping, writing, dancing, health... all things that I already currently do, but would love to have a bit more wild abandon when I do them, and not isolate myself with them any longer. I would love to find more peace and healing with the loss of my dad. Its almost been a year since he killed himself, and of course the emotions have been a rollercoaster. Id love to one day get to a point where I can daydream about my daddy again in a more beautiful light. Right now, there are days I can barely stand to think about him because it just hurts too bad... And I hate that, I want to think about him and remember all of his silly quirky things. I will get there, these things take time and a course of their own, I know. I also wish to form deeper relationships with some of the beautiful people I have met online in the past few years. I have truly met some special people through my blog and my shop, and Id love for some of them to really become life long friendships.
Yesterday was such a good birthday party. I had myself so excited about the day that by the time 5 o'clock rolled around I had a migraine, and it only got worse throughout the whole night. But I had such good friends around me that I just didnt let it ruin it. We went and sat in the river for a while, which felt sooooo good. The water was just right, not too cold, the sun was also perfect, as it went down... just a warm glow feeling on my cheeks and shoulders. Truly like being kissed by the sun. Then we came back to the house, ate some yummy food, chilled in the back yard. Everyone seemed to love everyone which makes me so happy. We got to see an old friend we haven't seen since high school... which was *cough* 12 years ago now! It was so nice. As the sun went down, they made a campfire, and by the end of the night I just drug the loungechair by the fire with a blanket and pillow and just laid there while they played guitar and sang and talked. So very perfect. Both our kitty and pup hung out with us the whole night too, just chillin wherever we were. I didnt get any pictures worth anything, but thats okay, I have good memories. I seriously feel so blessed with the friendships I have. They are few... but true, deep good ones. People Im completely honored to call a friend. There were moments last night that almost brought me to tears b/c of their pure love and generosity. Im kind of IN LOVE with my friends. For sure.
Today, after I get a little bit of work done (yes, Im going to work a bit on my birthday, b/c Im crazy like that)... we are going to go see Moonrise Kingdom! Im sooooo excited to see anything by Wes Anderson. The trailer looks so cute.
Oh, and those beautiful flowers above were one of my sweet birthday gifts. They are just the prettiest things ever... What a sweet gift. I got so many amazing thoughtful gifts last night, I wont go into them just yet. But oh my god, lets just say I was surprised!!!
ANNOUNCEMENT:
In honor of my birthday, Im having a HUGE giveaway on Sincerely Kinsey today! AND, if you go enter the giveaway and read the post, you just might find a one day coupon code to use in the shop today only!!!
PEACE,
Laura