Textile Gypsy Earrings...
Today I am just going to share with you the rest of the fabric earrings I made. They are all listed in the Roots and Feathers shop. And there are more goodies coming to the shop soon. Did I mention Im in love?
What is your favorite item out of my Roots and Feathers shop? Im curious to know. I keep finding it going in so many directions. I truly love the work Im doing for it.
Off to finish making toasted sandwiches for dinner.
PEACE,
Laura
Violet, Obella & Roots and Feathers...
Today Violet got to be a free dog for the first time in two months!!! She did great at her check up and they gave her the okay to be outside a bit off the leash. For those of you who are fairly new to reading, she had heartworms, and has been on medication and house bound for two months now. She came through like a pro. No doubt that all of your prayers were heard. She sure had so much love shown to her when I first posted about it here.
When we went to the post office today (with my 19 packages to mail in hand) I was so happy to get my Obella Organics headwraps in the mail. We had a wonderful trade with each other. You can see her recent post wearing her Violet Bella scarf tank, and both her and her two precious little girls wearing VB braided headbands. So so darling. This girl is a true gem in this world. I love her morals and the way she lives her life and raises her family. Such an amazing woman. So... onto my headwraps from her. I LOVE them. I got two different colors, one short and one long. This is the long one. Im excited about all of the different ways I can wear it. Today, I wore it sort of like a messy turban/bun wrap. I wear my hair up alot when I dont want to mess with it, so this worked perfectly! Im planning on using this long wrap as a belt and as a scarf this fall.
Also, today I worked on a batch of new earrings for my Roots and Feathers line. They are single (solo) earrings and are tassel like with vintage trims and such, and beads, and some have feathers. Ive had these dreamt up in my head since I first made my necklaces in the shop with the fabric strips. They are some of my favorites. And Im kind of obsessed right now with single earrings. Im pretty much in love. I think these are going to be a staple in my fall wardrobe.
On another note, I just want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart for all of your comments on my last post. So many people took so much time and heart and thought into your words you left me, and so many of them left me with tears rolling down my cheeks. I am moved, literally, moved, by the kindness I have received from people I have never met, all across the globe. Thank you for allowing me to have this space online as my safe place to share my soul. It has truly been a huge part of my healing process. I think I would be in a much different state if I was not able to share these things openly. Honestly, blogging has allowed me to really find myself in a way. Writing out my thoughts on a daily basis, really keeps me in touch with what is real in my life, and being able to go back and look at the posts I have written, have sort of allowed me to grow within myself more. Does anyone else feel that way?
Why not leave you with a song...
PEACE,
Laura
Daddy, I miss you...
I miss my daddy so much. I know that lately I probably seem like I am doing just fine, keeping myself busy with work and sales... But there is not really a moment I dont have him on my mind. Lately Ive been trying to not think about him, b/c its almost too painful when I do. I can get sick to my stomach in an instant by thinking about what he did. So I have to just switch my thoughts real fast and keep on with something else. There are so many crazy stages to grief. It is like a bottomless pit of feelings you never knew you could possess, for the person who is gone, for yourself, for life...
I love this photo above. I love the way my parents looked at each other. And my moms long hair. Before my dads hair turned salt and pepper. And my Pap in the background, looking at the look in his daughter's eyes. I love it. They are all now gone from this earth. Hopefully all looking at each other like this again. Missing my dad has brought up all of my old feelings of missing my mom. I could really really use her here with me right now. But, I wouldnt want her to have to go through this, so Im glad she is not here in a way. My dad's choice to take his own life is affecting so many people still here on earth. Hopefully in time, we will all be able to grow and learn from this painful experience, I can only hope.
I keep dreaming about my dad. He looks happy and healthy each time I see him. And I can hear his voice too. I think he has been answering some of my questions for me. I have so many of them. This may be a bit graphic, but last night I dreamt I was talking with him. I burst out in tears and asked him, 'If this was so thought out and well planned, why didnt you take a moment to leave a note that just says i love you'. He told me he had been planning to do this for years now, but when the time came, it all happened so fast, that he just didnt. - now although that is not really the answer that I want, its most likely something my brain has just produced b/c it has been mulling through so many questions and scenarios for weeks now, it just desperately wants something.
I think one of the hardest parts of this, is knowing my dad was an impatient man. He could never wait for things. When something needed to be done, or he was ready to leave somewhere, it was now. I really think if he could have had a bit more patience with life, he would have seen a whole new side to it. He really was still so full of life and had so much to offer this world, I just dont think he himself saw it. I really think some of the best years of his life could have been right before his eyes, but he gave up too soon. I could be wrong. It may have only gotten harder for him. Somethings, we will never know.
I yearn for the day I can look back on my daddy with feelings none other than love and compassion. I know that is at the core of my feelings, but right now I cant help but feel so many other things. I will forever be left with a wounded heart. It is soooo much different than losing someone who is sick, like my mom was.
I only share these personal feelings b/c maybe someone out there reading this has gone through this too, and you wont feel so alone. Or it may help someone in a different way, maybe someone who has thought about doing this. I only can hope that my openess and honesty will bring light to someone in some way. I have thought about starting a different blog just for these feelings, but I always come back to the fact that this blog is my life. Its not just my art, or the things I love, its my life. And life is black and white, and every shade of gray and color in between you can imagine. I think my daddy only saw life in black and white sometimes. And its not.
My heart goes out to all of the orphans in this world, b/c now I truly feel a bit of what they feel. And to anyone who has gone through losing someone close to them. It is the hardest part of life. Love to you.
PEACE,
Laura